Week 7: I'll Say What You Want Me to Say

First, before I start, I want to thank everyone for their replies to my emails and the emails they send filled with inspiration. These messages are amazing!

Now, my work has officially started. After mais ou menos 28 hours of traveling, we arrived at the house of our mission president, President Santos. He's a great guy, who doesn't speak a word of English! The lunch we had was delicious, like all of the lunches I've had with members here so far. Then, I met my companion, Elder Port. Elder Port is our DL, and I can see why, he is incredibly hard working! He also is from the south of Brazil and doesn't speak any english. I am incredibly grateful for how patient he is while attempting to explain our plans with me not understand it at all, especially when I can be not as patient and cooperative with him as I should be.

Our area is Jardim Inga, south of Brasilia. It's not a big city, but not small either, we've had to walk at least an hour to some appointments. The people are amazingly kind and receptive to hear a message about Jesus Christ. It's especially amazing when that invitiation is given by a dumb American attempting to communicate like me. As proof of how hard working my companion is and how kind the people are, Elder Port set a goal yesterday afternoon to get 23 people's contacts on the street, and we somehow did, talking to nearly everyone we saw. The work, it's happening!

That look of "keep trying" -- I am grateful I get it every time I try to bear my testimony of a scripture or speak to someone on the street. My language is broken and I have no idea if I'm actually being understood, and it's amazing that people we talk to have enough love and patience to try to listen to me. 

Americano -- Already, the people we talk to have many fun perspectives and questions for me. I've been asked how to say multiple things in English, including people's names and random things I see, and to translate plenty of song titles and lyrics to Portuguese; though, I don't know how to translate them either, rip. Lastly, a women in our ward told me that I look like Kirby's character in Best Two Years of My Life. She pulled up a picture, and I guess I can kind of see the resemblance.

This Week's Hymn -- Despite our successes and the support I've gotten, I still find myself being caught up on the little difficulties and on myself. I think about how I'm negatively perceived by everyone I talk to and not the message being shared; I worry about if I'll fit my language study the next morning instead of the work we're doing at the moment; and I find myself asking what I will be getting from the mission and not what the mission needs from me. And so, this week's hymn is I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go. 

It's a wonderful melody that I was reminded of when I asked Elder Port what his favorite hymn was, and he responded the English title of a hymn, "I Love the Lord from Beloved Missionary Hymns," the same hymn and same arrangement by BYU Men's Chorus that was my first hymn shared here. The same album has my favorite arrangement of I'll Go Where You Want Me to Go.

It's a little odd to have a desire to have a desire to do something, but I do. Every day, I ask in prayer to have the desire to do the work, to go where he wants me to go. Today, while reading in Mosiah 28, I found what motivated Alma the Younger during his difficult missionary work:

"3 Now they were desirous that salvation should be declared to every creature, for they could not bear that any human soul should perish; yea, even the very thoughts that any soul should endure endless torment did cause them to quake and tremble."

This was an answer to me to focus more on the people I am teaching. And, as I still worry about the ability of my language to communicate the message I want to, I think of the second verse, and the line: "I'll say what you want me to say." I know it's a test of my faith to open my mouth and begin speaking, to say whatever the Lord wants me to say, even if that's five words, two of them misconjugated, if the Spirit can do the rest.

That's all for this week, thank you for all of your support.

Elder Haroldsen

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